On Aloneness

In your loneliness
You were alone. 

Solo.

So low,
on your lonely journey.

Then you are remembered:   

You are one.

You are not the only.

In our loneliness we are many,
In our aloneness we are one.

Together we are many,
Together we are one. 

In aloneness, we are together.
In togetherness, we are one.

We are one
in aloneness, together. 

Poem written by this week’s guest, the artist formally known as Aers Astra

3 ideas + 3 questions on aloneness, from me.

Aloneness is the experience of being in conversation with your inner world. In Aloneness, you hear the sound of your essence emanating from your inner core. When you are truly alone, you are surrounded by your inner silence, a deep, continuous, nurturing presence. Loneliness on the other hand, is the sound of your discontent. Loneliness is the experience of being simultaneously disconnected from your outer world and your inner world. A sense of the absence of belonging at home with yourself and finding no belonging at home in the presence of others. A good experience of loneliness, if felt deeply, leads you into the presence of what is always, already here, aloneness. A few thoughts on your conversation with aloneness and loneliness.

1. When you are feeling particularly overwhelmed by your loneliness, go and sit in your favorite chair ensuring no distractions (e.g. books, electronics etc.) are in proximity. While you sit in your chair, sit fully in the presence of your loneliness and feel it fully and completely. Sit for as long as you can with no disruptions or interruptions.

2. When you are feeling particularly overwhelmed by your loneliness, invite a friend over for a coffee. Explain to your friend that you need to have a present, honest, deep, authentic and vulnerable conversation about how you feel. Share everything you need to about how loneliness is making you feel. Hold nothing back.  

3. When you are feeling particularly overwhelmed by your loneliness, and it is too overwhelming to sit with yourself with no distractions and there is no one you can call, imagine all of the other people in the world who are feeling exactly as you feel now. Imagine these are the people you are walking the earth with today, who are feeling the exact same feeling you are feeling. Sit with the idea that these are the people who help you find belonging in your journey of loneliness because you are not truly lonely, they are walking this journey with you today.   

Three questions for your inquiry of aloneness:

1. When you are alone, do you feel at home with yourself?

2. When you are lonely, what are you avoiding?

3. What is the best thing about being alone?

3 insights on aloneness, from others.

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